I just had a couple beers and I feel like sharing some thoughts. No better place than my blog I suppose. Oh, and if you’re under 21 in the states, don’t drink with me. Otherwise, grab a beer and read along.
Lots of things swimming around in my head right now. Just released Arvale: Treasure of Memories, trying to find a way to distribute that better, I recently took the JLPT and have no idea how I did, I’m moving to Japan in two days and I have no money (and no job). My website is now ranked with Alexa at 400,000 in the world which seems abnormally high considering my traffic (less than you think, despite my fancy logo and designs).
Honestly, life is looking pretty bleak. Which sucks to say, especially since most of my site is light-hearted and tries to make people feel better. The more I think about it, working at a normal job, in the end, may be the best course of action for most people. To think of a terrible analogy, living in a socialist government makes the citizens do less paperwork. They don’t have to worry about health insurance or doing taxes every year, I’m not even sure if accountants exist in Sweden (what a scary thought it would be… if the US ever went to a Flat, Value Added Tax system; all the accountants would no longer have work to do).
In any case, all the crappy things you don’t want to deal with is taken care of by your big daddy, the government. In some ways, this is how a lot of people choose their employers and careers. They don’t want to start their own business or do freelance because they would have to figure out how to get health insurance, file for a corporation, do complicated tax forms, save their own money for retirement. It all seems like a lot of crappy paperwork that no one wants to deal with.
The closer I look at my own life, the more I realize it is 80% crappy paperwork and other work I don’t want to do and 20% more stuff I don’t want to do. Leaving myself with 0% everything else.
Someone recently told me I should stop chasing my silly dreams and goals. It’s time for me to settle down and get a normal job. A job which would be easier to explain in one sentence when describing what it is that I do. That way that person can avoid a long, interesting conversation. Because nobody wants to stand out and have an interesting conversation. Apparently, after the age of 25, you should stop trying to reach your goals and dreams and give up. That’s what everyone else does, and it worked so well for them, right? Did you give up on your goals and dreams?
Social media is becoming more confusing. Facebook added some privacy features to cover their asses and make people click 17 more times before being able to get to the captcha before they can almost post how they are feeling at the moment. Twitter is full of bots and following programs and everyone is searching for the most followers because it will win them some marketing award and make them feel better about not having a date to the highschool prom.
Meanwhile, all my friends from High School and University are married with 2-6 kids and/or divorced. I am supposed to feel jealous and underachieving. Should I? Do you?
At the end of the tunnel, there is… more tunnel. I’ve been running uphill for several years now and my legs are getting tired (although they probably look really strong and impressive). That was a metaphor, for the uninitiated.
Newspapers and Magazine industries are now worth less than social media networks. Some big-ass news corporation with decades or experience and branding just sold for like $5 million dollars. Meanwhile some tiny social media site you’ve never heard of, just sold for $8 point something million. Who needs successful business strategies when you have technology?
The US dollar is weak. Really weak. I just tried to exchange what money I had left into Japanese Yen (because I am hoping to be able to afford some food, maybe shelter, when I arrive) and the bank said they didn’t want any more dollars, they weren’t worth much. Where is your money?
I know a relatively successful company with capital investors who have been stringing them along for more than 5 years with the promise of money down the road. I thought that only worked with a carrot, a stick, and some barnyard animals. I can’t believe intelligent human beings fall for that trick too.
I can’t believe I’m posting these thoughts publicly. Feel free to chastise me.
Speaking of which, no one is allowed to talk about the JLPT publicly on the web or they might invalidate their score. So I won’t risk that. Oh, there’s that carrot thing again.
The point of this post? The same point as blogs. If you feel as lost, or as depressed, or as uncertain, or anything similar, you’re not alone. In fact, after reading my messed up situation, you might even feel elated. Do you?
And some of my friends actually think I’m accomplished with my whole future ahead of me. Little do they know I’m jealous of their 9-5 jobs, weekends, and days off.
Beer is wearing off, so I better publish this before I change my mind. Then it’s back to dream chasing.
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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
J, take it from someone who’s done the 9-5 and gotten married with 4 kids — keep chasing your dream till you catch it and make it your bitch! We are. My wife continues to pursue her dream of starting a daycare business and continues to talk about that one day we have our own facility. The fact is, it’ll never happen if we say “screw it, it’s too late,” or “I guess we missed our chance.” You’re still young (despite how old you feel) and have an amazing amount of talent. You’re special or else you wouldn’t be my friend. And don’t forget, I’m moving into your pool house once you get one.
Let me tell you, as I’m sure you’ve heard before, that many millionaires bankrupted several companies before getting their break. It is what it is and nothing great comes easy. I envy you my old friend, you have a dream. I still have no clue what I want to do when I grow up. I’ve managed to track down every friend I had in highschool and every single one of them are successful (with BA’s at the least, and several doctorates). If nothing else, do ME the favor of being successful so I can live vicariously through you.
You are “da bomb” buddy, keep on keeping on. You’re a rockstar.
Thanks for the thoughts BDawg. Highly appreciated.
No way, don’t stop chasing the dream.
The average person is average for a reason. They gave up on their hopes and dreams. They settled. They are smart enough to avoid being sub-average, but their highest achievement is ‘average’. They gave up on their natural talents and took the easy road.
And then there is Jason.
When the average give up on a dream, it is realistic. When the talented give up on a dream, it is a tragedy.
Jason has never been average since the day I met him almost a decade ago. He was a kid, even though he was old enough to legally drink, with a spark and a big imagination. I saw it immediately, and I knew big things, big adventures awaited him. He didn’t just talk about dreams, he had plans and made them happen. He had a method to follow through and the talent to get it done.
A decade later, I am proud to say that I was not wrong. Jason IS achieved. Jason has lived the dream and Jason is the dream. In a short span, he has achieved much more than many will achieve in their entire life.
And he has so much farther to go.
Wow. I’m blushing. I know that’s difficult to express over the internet, but really, my face is red and my ears are all hot. I think I’m a bit teary-eyed too, but that may just be my allergies, or my contacts. Yes, definitely my contacts. *cough*
Thanks for the kind words, randall. I sincerely do appreciate it, especially coming from someone whom I admire and respect (a fellow artist and developer, of arguably better talents and skills than myself, at that).